Question: When did Award shows get so horrible?

It must've been sometime at the end of high school or beginning of college when I just stopped watching award shows. Not even the Golden Globes could pull me in for the full 3 (or 4?) hours and those are usually the fun ones. Doesn't help that I haven't seen any of the movies nominated, don't watch 30 Rock (which, apparently, is the gift from god) and can't really bring up the fake tears for an "in memoriam" to Heath Ledger. And it's not even the speeches that are horrible, it's the presenters. It's reading things off the television prompt and having awkward conversations about film editing that drag on and on.

Tonight, I watched the first ten minutes of the Grammy's and almost took my eye out with a spoon. It was that bad. Remember when The Rock was a wrestler and an almost-actor with that weird eyebrow thing? Well, now he goes by some other name and makes lame jokes on award shows. I'm still not sure what he was doing there; I didn't stick around long enough to find out if he was the host and would keep torturing people. I watched Coldplay then gave up. I'm not sure I saw any actual awards.

Maybe this is partly my fault. I've gotten more picky in my old age and therefore, don't like spending my time watching or listening to things that have no relevance whatsoever. It's why I can't watch MTV award shows either, and those used to be the fun fun times. Yeah, no more. Just lame. Giving awards to people who are younger than me -- what do those Jonas Brothers actually sing? They're like Hanson, is that it? Things must be coming full circle to when I was in 7th grade and obsessed with music and movies. Ahhh memories.

On Notice: New England Snow

I'm putting this winter's snow on notice officially. I know we've complained about it forever, but I'm starting to believe that it has been particularly horrible this year.

Snow, you suck, we hate you. You bring us no joy. You bring us traffic and delays and disabled trains and slippery sidewalks mixed with soggy pants and UGG knockoffs that need 29 hours to dry out. And when you do decide to grace us with your magnanimous presence, you do so on the weekends. The weekends! Snow + weekends = shitty social life because I don't want to drive in that. I don't even want to clean off my car until Monday morning.

Look, snow, if you're going to be around until May, just please be considerate to those who don't get off from work/school every time a flake falls from the heavens. The ground rules will now include, but are not limited to:

• Snow in the short amount of time after the morning commute but before the evening commute.

• Warm and sunny weather in the morning to get rid of the snow that turns into ice that makes it slippery.

• No slushy stuff.
  

• Snow must come already packaged with the sidewalk salt stuff.
  

• No wind. Isn't it already enough that it's cold and snowing? Do I really need the wind too?

I think everyone will be happier if snow takes these rules into consideration and implements them immediately.

Thank you.